The Power of Vulnerability & The Day the Writing Started
Yesterday I was invited to be a guest speaker for a group of marketing students at Indiana University Bloomington. I chose to talk about “10 Important Lessons I’ve Learned in My Career (…so you don’t have to)” and covered some of the ideas I wrote about in an earlier post this year by a similar name.
My career has been a non-traditional adventure to say the least… so anytime I’m given an opportunity to discuss what I’ve experienced in the realities of the world, juxtaposed to my generally positive, optimistic outlook, I’m grateful to share my perspective and be as honest as possible. I believe that sharing different points of view on the workplace is importance… especially with young professionals who are looking to be future leaders in the workforce.
The students were engaged and asked thoughtful, follow up questions throughout:
Richard wanted to know more about how I felt and how I dealt with being fired from some of my jobs
Someone asked, “how do I stay up to date on the latest marketing trends?
Another student asked, “what kind of marketing had the most impact on me?
I believe Jenna asked, “what is your daily routine like?”
And Madlyn asked, “Do you only journal for yourself, personally, or do you do it for your work too? And how did you start journaling?”
It was a good mix of professional and personal questions. It’s interesting to see what types of questions people ask and what interests them. It always informs my next conversation or presentation. I did my best to answer them as honestly and authentically as possible. That’s what I believe these discussions are about. Being honest. real. vulnerable. Sharing challenges and successes. My friend who leads the class sent me this afterwards, “Dave. You were so aligned with our work, our textbook and our voice of customer emphasis… great career advice too! …your vulnerability is just what they needed to hear.” I was happy to read that I was able to make a contribution.
Later I reflected on what she texted me. Vulnerability… it’s a big part of journaling… and life. In journaling, it’s the first major step; writing down all of your thoughts, ideas and emotions to get them out and exposed. It makes them real. It’s how I why I got started in the first place. By working through much of it in the pages of my journal internally, it’s given me more confidence and clarity to express myself externally in life. But it’s hard, being vulnerable. Letting our guard down. Sharing how we really feel. Being exposed.
I also reflected on Madlyn’s questions last night, going so far as to pull out what I call my first “official” journal and read back through some of my earliest entries. Given her question yesterday, I thought I would share my first entry:
The Day I Decided to Write
The day I started writing, I was 28 years old. I was living in South Deerfield, Massachusetts with my girlfriend in a beautiful, three-story yellow house her mom deeded her & her sister and brothers, after she passed away. I was working at Friendly’s Ice Cream as a merchandising manager in the marketing department and was being mentored by the Vice President of Marketing, who was a Dartmouth trained ivy-leaguer, who like my energy and positive outlook on life.
I played bass in an original alternative-rock band called Hallucinating Arkansas. And I spent my Christmas holidays in the Swiss Alps. I was living what many would consider a blessed life, especially as an adopted child and first-generation college graduate, who had grown up in the working-class, mill town of Taunton, Massachusetts.
I always cite Friday, November 22, 1996 as the first day I started keeping track of my days.
It was a cloudy, overcast day, in the high 30’s, low 40’s. I was sitting in a room on the first floor that we had converted into an office/study. It was in the front of the house, with a door to my left that led into the living room and a door in the front, that led into a hallway, to a staircase that went upstairs to the right and the front door to the left. If I turned around, I could see Mt. Sugarloaf out of the long window.
Here is the actual start to my first entry:
november96jounralentries
I have decided once again to try to keep a daily summary of my life. I hope to include my daily activities, thoughts, impressions, goals, passing whims, reflections, & inspirations… my journal entries will reflect how I am feeling. here goes…”
11.22.96 Friday South Deerfield, MA
“Woke up around 9:30AM. I felt pretty tired. Moved downstairs to check my work messages… Called Norm up. Drove down to Northampton to play tennis. Hung out at his house for a while. Listened to fusion and ate cavatelli with cheese. We also listened to some of his finished originals. He is an awesome songwriter and arranger. One of the most talented musicians I know. His arrangements, sounds and melodies are beautiful…” (the journal entry continues for a couple more pages)
Why that particular day?
I don’t know. Leading up to this, I had been getting up in the middle of the night, sporadically for weeks to write down my ideas. I had this unwelcome routine of waking up in the middle of the night, lying in bed and working through ideas in my head… at first, work ideas, then song ideas, philosophical ideas… it was quite maddening actually.
I would wake up at say, 3:00 AM and for the next 60 – 90 minutes, turn over the idea again & again & again, until, what I believed was the perfect solution and then eventually fall back asleep.
Of course, when I woke up, I would have forgotten many of the details. Maddening. It would make me crazy. I would quickly try to recreate the idea details in a notebook… in fragments and pieces. Finally, to solve this “problem” of forgetting, I started getting up and working on the ideas in the bathroom in the middle of the night as to not wake up my girlfriend. And even though I got the idea down, I would be exhausted in the morning.
I was convinced, or at least hopeful, that journaling might help get my creativity under control.
In truth, it wasn’t the first time I had kept an account of a life event. I have always been an avid notetaker and have more than a few examples of “journaling” that predates this “first” entry. Here are five examples of times when I kept notes:
In June ’96 I took my first cross-country, road trip with my buddy Jim, driving from Arizona to Massachusetts.
In August of ’96 I took a two-week road trip from Minnesota, through South Dakota and Wyoming to Glacier National Park in Montana. It was an incredible adventure in the upper Plains & Rocky Mountain States. We drove through the Black Hills and the Badlands. The landscape is absolutely stunning. I visited Mount Rushmore and the Crazy Horse monuments. I also drove through Custer State Park where we were less than 5’ away from a wild Bison herd… so close we could hear them grunt and snort. And Glacier State Park is one of the most beautiful places in the country.
I wrote down the story of my adoption when I was in college
I wrote down the story of the “almost” meeting my birthmother, also during college
I kept detailed notes around my Crystal Healing Training & Astral Projection exercises, also while I was in college
So, 11/22/96 was the day I started writing everyday…